Thursday, September 20, 2012
No Harm Shall Come to Tom Brady
Troy: "Mr. Lewis, Tom Brady and the Patriots are in town for you on Sunday night. I bet they are upset over their loss last week, and they don't lose back to back games. Any plans to change that?"
Ray: "STATISTICALLY SPEAKING, TROY, YOU'RE RIGHT! WE ALREADY HAVE HOME FIELD ADVANTAGE, THOUGH, AND I'M GONNA KIDNAP ALL THE TIGHT ENDS TO GUARANTEE A RAVENS WIN!"
Troy: "Why not just kidnap Tom Brady?"
Ray: "WHOA, TROY! THAT'S A FEDERAL CRIME! I'D GET THE CHAIR FOR THAT!"
*Shawn wanted me to add a note stating that he doesn't think that Troy would suggest that Ray kidnap anyone, particularly a fellow football player. However, I was running out of room and needed Troy to bring up Brady so I could give Ray's punchline.
For those who may not know much about football, Tom Brady is regarded as something of a god in the NFL. He has his own rule to make sure he doesn't get hurt. (I don't know how often it gets called for other quarterbacks, however.) Of course, to fans, he's considered a pansy. I mean, the man MODELS UGGS, people. Seriously. (Warning: the pansy link takes you to a hilarious Yahoo! answers page. Naughty language and a complete slaughtering of the English language are present.)
This will be a great revenge match for the Ravens, as the Patriots were the reason we didn't get to go to the Super Bowl last year. Between Lee Evans's dropped pass and Billy Cundiff's missed field goal (I'm honestly surprised that he didn't receive death threats), the game was an absolute heart-breaker. The Ravens will also be "upset," as Troy so mildly put it.
Also!! My mom's going to be in town for the game! I'll probably post a picture of us in our "uniforms" on Sunday.